:: UNFAITHFUL ::

Good day earthlings! I'm darn free now 'cos exam is officially over! *rawr* Today's the last day of exam but I'm not as happy as expected earlier, though. We will have to sit for a few more trials soon and then only PMR and JUEC. Life's like this, so eventful yet feeling so empty. What about the exam? It was, not that good... but better than the previous one. I've tried my very utmost already. It's the maximum of what I could do. I couldn't do anything more than that. So I would like to say I'm pretty satisfied with my performance for this exam even though I sort of flunked Physics and Biology. Let's not talk about the exam hey?

Let's talk about the week before school reopened. I received an email from the Singapore Ministry of Education. Yeap, I've been shortlisted for the ASEAN scholarship exam on general ability, maths and english tests in Garden International. I didn't bother much 'cos I wasn't even thinking of heading to Singapore anyway. Dad knew and he kept encouraging me to give it a go, but I was heck lazy 'cos if I were to go, I had to wake up at 6.30am. Plus, the tests and all the activities were separated into two days, which were a Saturday and a Sunday. After a few days, I received an airmal about the scholarship thingy again. Didn't bother too. Gillian was like my dad. Both of them kept telling me to go, but I insisted staying at home. On Saturday, Gillian messaged me after the tests and said only 6 students were chosen from each school. Blimey! SIX students! I didn't know it was so limited! Only Me, Gillian, Seth, Beng, MunHeen and JiaJie got shortlisted! I was the only one who didn't sit for the tests. People who are way better than me like SongLim and Sam didn't get the chance! Until now, I feel extremely guilty. Look, if I didn't register for it in the first place, maybe people who wished to be chosen would have been chosen. I threw away the chance of a gold. Slap me.

Mummy registered Sri KL for me. I will have to sit for the entrance exam with Jane on the 2nd of July. Which also means, I WILL BE SKIPPING ONE DAY OF SCHOOL! Hah I feel awesome. Thinking that I will be skipping PE class just makes me go hyper LOL. All of us, will be separated to our own lane next year. I'll be transferring, zYuan will be in Cempaka homeschool, yLing will be in Sri Garden whilst Gillian going to be in Singapore. Anyhow, this is for our own good. Kuen Cheng High is definitely not a school for humans. It causes extreme brain damage, torture with absurd school policies. Leaving is for the continuity of our live. I'll break down into something other than maltose, polypeptides or whatever thingies (sorry, too much of science hovering in my mind) if I were to be in this stupid school for two more years.

Birthday bashes! I know I know. These are things of months ago. But I'm still gonna blog about these. Firstly, it was yLing's birthday. We surprised her during the 1st recess. We bought her macarons and a photo album. Tell you what, most of my friends who flipped through the photo album said the same thing, "Yerrrr, you guys are such good friends. I hope I have friends like you all." Hahaha Yes we are! We spent about a month time to finish up with all the decorations, the words, and also adhering the photos of our memories. She was so touched her tears couldn't stop trickling. The most successful birthday bash ever!! She thought we have forgotten about her birthday. No worries! Your birthday can never ever be forgotten! We cross our heart! Thanks for the tears of pearl, they're beautiful XD. Alright, YiLing, I hope you like all the things we did for you. They're all about our sincere and love for you. Happy birthday :) .


Secondly, yTeng's birthday bash! We pretended like we knew nothing in the morning. I didn't wish her at all. But well, it was quite obvious that we were pretending. She knew, I guess. Since she pretended like she knew nothing, we might as well pretend haha. We surprised her during the 2nd recess. She didn't look surprised at all :( . Bought Uhu Uhu! cupcakes and an Oscar award for her. The lamest gift ever ahah. Oh and, the box for the award stated that it must only be given to winners, and it also says it's fragile. How cute :D . Dear YiTeng, next time when there are chances of birthday bashes for you, ACT LIKE YOU'RE SURPRISED so we can feel successful. Best is try to show us a few drops of your tears. Hahahaha we'll see ;) . Happy birthday and we love you. Don't pressure yourself so much. We're worried of you. We don't wanna see you staying up till 3 o'clock every day to study. We understand, all the stress you shoulder as the top student for the entire form is indescribable. But you still have to learn ways to chill. Okay :) ?

Lastly, zYuan's birthday bash! The most depressing birthday bash I would say. FYI, she's a HUGE FAN of YogaLin. Her mum didn't want to get her his new album so we were planning to buy her one and get her a soft toy together. Early in the morning on her birthday, I handed the donashi and the gifts to yLing. When I returned to class, she was telling us that her mum got her the album on Sunday. We were so shocked we didn't know what to say. YTeng said 'This will be the most surprising birthday gift for her'. Haha yea indeed. So during the 1st recess, we celebrated her birthday in class. Her expression went O.O when she opened the paper bag with the album inside. She was screaming 'AHHHHHH I GOT THIS ONE ALREADY!!'. How miserable... :( . This co-incidence brought us a lesson, which is to assure that the gift you're gonna buy for someone is something which she/her does not own. Anyway, happy birthday, son. Please continue being the crazy old brat haha. Have fun in life :D !

Our very last year,

with such beautiful memories :) .

I love you all.

A friendship won

A friendship lost

A friendship full of love and trust

A friendship gone

A friendship there

A friendship that we'll

ALWAYS share

xoxo

:: SOMETIMES WHEN WE TOUCH ::

I, am so pressurized, by everything. Not like my friends in my school are chilling or what. And I'm definitely not making my life and theirs a comparison. I just wanna voice out everything that has never been revealed. No peeps, this is not an emo post. I wanna let my thoughts to be known, to be noticed, to be acknowledged.

Ever since I was born, I have always been the daughter of my parents who just simply acquiesce to their demands and their words. Now sometimes, I would just reminisce about everything. Not exactly, reminisce 'cos they aren't a good thing. So I would better say recall. When I was merely 5, my mum gave me two must-choose-one options, which were to go for violin OR ballet class. I was not even thinking about going for both but what could I do? I had no rights to defend. Violin and ballet? No way. Since young, I think violin could only produce squeaky sounds and to me, they were definitely not MUSIC. Ballet? Imagine myself dancing along the song of Fur Elise. More no way. I had to choose one on the spot and I, chose violin. The worst decision ever. But I was forced to do so. Until now, I still hate myself being a part of the violinists on planet earth. I suck in every bow, every double stops, every pizzicato, every turki, EVERYTHING!

Until when I was standard 6, my mum FINALLY thought out of the box. She asked me if I were keen to sit for the WMS entrance exam. Which meant, if I passed, I could put down EVERYTHING in Mandarin. Basically, my Mandarin has never been good. Oh and just for your information sake, I failed my Mandarin in the last term school exam. My FIRST time. I didn't bother much, since I suck in Mandarin so much already. I went, I studied so much for the entrance exam, not for UPSR, eventually I passed. You wouldn't know how jovial I was. I was like on cloud nine to the maximum words just couldn't describe. Think about it. You get to put down things you loathe for so long. Ain't life just fabulous with such brusque changes? Oh and, do you know that this friend of mine who was the top-5 student in my primary school failed the entrance exam? See? I've got such precious opportunity my parents didn't notice. They simply dumped me to this STUPID HECK CHINESE SCHOOL without even asking for my opinions. Was I invisible? Was I even noticeable? Was I really out of their sight? They made such stupid decision, not caring about how I really felt at that moment. And yes, you can totally imagine the situations after I was officially registered for KC High. I didn't talk to them for a week. I was so mad at them. Didn't they know how much I hated/hate Mandarin? I hate it I hate it I hate it. I feel like a bird that has been locked in a cage for decades. I feel like a stupid AH LIAN studying Mandarin from kindergarten, primary school and high school. Please, NO MORE MANDARIN WHEN I GO TO OVERSEAS FOR FURTHER STUDIES.

It's been 3 years. Yes, THREE YEARS. They don't know, I friggin' cried just for the friggin' maths exam. I didn't get the point. All the formulae, all the equations. Okay I SUCK IN MATHS. Don't ever think that students in A class are all prodigies. Especially someone good-for-nothing like me. The don't know, HOW STRESSED I ALWAYS AM when I come to class tests and school exams. Do you guys know that we're actually studying twice of what you guys are studying? We study maths (including SPM add-maths and mod-maths syllabus), chemistry, physics, biology, geography (c), history (c), chinese, english, BM for JUEC ; KH, sejarah, geografi, maths, science, chinese, english, BM for PMR. See. THIS IS WHAT YOU CALL ... S-T-R-E-S-S. If you're sitting for only PMR in a government school, PLEASE, FEEL BLESSED.

I study, just because I wanna remain in A class and not for my future or whatsoever. THIS TIME, I'm gonna make a huge decision of a lifetime. I HAVE MY OWN RIGHTS AND I DON''T WANNA BE CONTROLLED. I DON'T WANNA STUDY USELESS STUFFS. I DON'T WANT MY TEENAGE LIFE TO BE SO STRESSED OUT. I DON'T WANT MY LIFE TO BE SO DEVASTATED. IMMA REVIVE IT FROM DEATH! I WANNA SUBSTITUTE SOMETHING I DEEPLY LIKE TO MY LIFE.

I would have to say that, NOT all of the students can handle such pressure. But well, some are good enough to cope with all of these. Especially those who are really interested in these subjects and those who are already so sure that they would be heading to the 'chinese-lane'. Like going to Taiwan or China. ME?????? PUH-LEASE!

How can I believe in myself when I'm not even being me??

I'M SO LEAVING.

No xoxo today for you. I'm on fire.

:: STARRY STARRY NIGHT ::

Smile for the sake of a smile,

Smile for the sake of happiness,

Smile for the sake of life,

Smile because of hope left in life.

Smile my friends,

Smile for me my Love,

Smile those same sweet smiles,

Smile so the world can be a peaceful dove...

Smile

xoxo

:: PETER PAN ::

Hello earthlings! I'm currently suffering, in PAIN. When I turn my head to the back, my neck aches; When I lift my left hand up, it aches; When I bend down my body; my backbone aches... In short, every single part of my body is aching. Yesterday's yoga class was superb. The postures were not really that tough but heck, all the postures stretched every part of my muscles. I just feel like lying down on my bed for the entire week. Even for now, my FINGERS are aching. Now I can completely comprehend the definition of, fragility. Yes I'm fragile. As fragile as smoke which turns into smouldering ashes easily; As fragile as flowers out there which would witter in no time; As fragile as a broken heart ... Urgh, Emily, please stop with all the philosophy.

So basically, today is quite an eventful day. Been through things which I have never tried. No, in precise, just ONE thing, which made me feel that belief in existence of spirits and sorts is pretty ... authentic. My mum says it's better not to blog/fb about this so I guess I won't be blogging about this. Haha, you can always nudge me in fb chat or ring me anytime. I will definitely tell you my experience, BUT not over here :D . Just being a typical daughter who follows her mum's demand. If you're really that interested, it's something to do with 'video conferencing with our dead ones'. Guess you're smart enough to get the picture already?

After that-very-scary-event, daddy brought us to Malacca. The highways were all congested. Daddy initially thought of returning to KL but well, the highway to KL was congested as well. Yea, just imagine us being stuck in the car for 4 hours. From KL to Malacca, 4-hour journey. Yes, nightmare. My dad kept repeating 'My legs jam already' whereas all of us were sleeping, but I was actually half awake. Malacca, a place with all attested historical buildings. A place, with so many things which recall bad memories. To Emily, the SUPER BORING PLACE EVERRR.

I've been to Malacca for so many times I lost count. My primary school trip has always been the same. Malacca, Malacca and MORE Malacca. 6 years already, and yes, I've been to Malacca for 6 years consecutively excluding those with the family, listening to the tour guide telling us about the same old story, blahblah. I hate Malacca. It's a place like an over-pressured sauna and a place which the authorities will never get rid of the filthiness. Yesterday, I told mum 'Can I stay at home'. Well, you know the answer already don't you?

Sobs, I was thinking, if I didn't end up in Malacca, I could have studied so so so much. Oh yea!! In my previous entry, I did mention that I would post up what I've studied. -long long whine -Nothing much. Seriously, nothing much. I studied a little of Biology and Physics. That's it. I think I'm dead.... Imagining the picture of myself screaming before the day of exam, I just feel like giving up. I'm serious for this time. GIVE UP is such an easy thing to do but to BUCK UP is so tough I would rather bang my head against the wall. I need, Higglytown Heroes. No joke here. Or maybe, Totally Spies or Kim Possible. Or even The Super Sleuths will do. What they have to do when they need help is to SING and TADAAA, problems are all solved. Does this work for us too? -tears drop on my BOOKS-

To my dearest you-know-who,

Chopsticks are always meant to be a pair,

Never separated never far apart

Never acknowledged but still together.

I can rely on you so much

I can separate this pair of chopsticks,

Taking half of my soul to you

For you are already NOTHING to me

as you're more than EVERYTHING to me.

xoxo

:: DIRTY LITTLE SECRETS ::

So, must be thinking if I literally studied? I'm disappointed in myself. I feel like the biggest loserh ever, occupying so much space on planet earth which tons of people out there could have been better than I do but didn't have the opportunities. I, failed studying. I initially wanted to study Biology and Physics today. But I was heck complaining about my school to Jane and in the end, I didn't study a thing. I'm worse than a pile of shit. I don't care. In my next update, I'll tell you what I've studied and I SWEAR for the next time, I will keep my words.

Went for History extra class in school just now. It sure was a total bore. Oh and, my attire went totally wrong LOL. For extra classes, the proper attire for a student: long pants + any T-shirts which belong to our school OR school uniform. I didn't know that, so I wore my PE shirt and PE shorts. HAHA I looked so outstanding. People were asking me 'You're ready to go for our next Sports Day?' haha. Oh and, today's KaiXin's birthday. Have a good life KaiXin :) ! Not to forget, my son did a very traumatic thing. She wore SLIPPERS to school, wow how great was that? Yeaa, she's awesome like that.

Alrighty, today, I'll be writing about my school's Sports Day, including preliminary match and finals. Sorry for the delay, I was super lazy to write about this, but I want Sports Day to be a part of my memory so that I can reminisce everything when I'm older haha. This is the main point why a blogger blogs about everything. Hmm, if I'm not mistaken, preliminary match was on a Friday. Me, ZhiSan and ChauPing took part in the 'metal ball' competition. Okay, I don't know what's it called but I guess you know about the game right? A game which you have to toss a metal ball as far as you can. Don't downgrade the ball. It looks petite but it's heavier than what you think. It was so heavy I didn't have ample energy to lift up the ball. I lost, we lost. Didn't give it too much expectations. I'm so not a sporty girl. Took part since nobody was interested. At least for now, I know how heavy a metal ball is.

The preliminary matches for throwing the javelin and discus were held in a sports school next to Sri Garden. Haha, lost. Made some new friends there Yay.

Congratulations are in order. I would like to seize this opportunity to congratulate some of my friends who got through the preliminary match and went into the finals. Gillian, WanZhen, YikXin, JingWern, BingSheng, YeowRong, JiaJie, KaiYin and YongXin. If I have mistyped any one of you, do tell. They were awesome. How I wish I could run like them. Taking a picture of me running on a track has always been on my wishlist. But hmmm, when will I ever get a chance for that? Camwhored a lot with Tzarina and YiTeng. We were bored to death. And it was hell hot over there. Good thing was they were playing so many awesome songs. They played 3 of Justin Bieber's songs and Tzarina went like 'AHHHHHHHHHHHHH'. Typical belieber LOL. The photos are all in my facebook photo gallery. I can't like, upload everything into Blogger haha. These are merely a part of it.

Finals was on a Monday. A terribly hot Monday I would say. Bought McDonald's for lunch. YeowRong simply spilled the syrup on MY hotcakes and man, do you know how much I hate the taste of syrup? So I gave my hotcakes to him, under no circumstances. How kind of me, yea right. Camwhored with Nini, YiLing, ZhuanYuan, YiTeng, and a little with MinXian and ZiEe. Boy, I'm glad that I have no friends who have camera phobia. Taking pictures are just sho sho fun :) , especially you have tons of friends together fooling around with you.

Firstly, much congrats to my awesome friend, GILLIAN LEE! Spot her medal *wowwwwwwww*. She's got a 1st runner up in the 4*100m race. See? We knew you could win! You practised so hard nobody could ever do that. Always have faith in yourself honey! There are still spaces for improvements and we hope one day we'll see you holding the medals in Olympics! Long live Gillian!! Next, congratulations to WanZhen, JingWern, Gillian and YikXin for achieving a GOLD medal in the 4*400m relay race! Man, you all totally rocked. Thirdly, well done to BingSheng and WanZhen! Guys, they have so awesome stamina they didn't even look tired after running in the 4*400m match. Define ENVIOUS. Haha. Last but not least, YongXin for winning in the high jump match! To those who lost, DON'T GIVE UP and YOU'RE NOT LOUSY, just, there are people out there who are better. So, THINK POSITIVELY. YOU, can be better than them!! Aal izz well! Huzzah! -More photos in Facebook -

Shyt, my back aches right now. Haha, crappy. Went to Empire Mall last week. Was walking around with Jane, we had nothing to do 'cos daddy and mummy were eating with the aunties and uncles in Kizsports. We saw so many awkward stuffs like a shop which sells recyclable things. Then, when we were to go to the carpark after lunch, we walked pass this 'World's Tallest Indoor Tube Slide' and daddy paid 12 bucks for me to have a ride. Was pretty scared at first 'cos the slide's hell long. Then, the guy pushed me and when I was sliding down, the only thing which came into my mind was 'THIS IS IT?? CHEHHHHH' . Yea, peeps, DON'T waste 12 bucks just for a stupid ride. If you wanna know how it feels like, just simply try on the slide in the park anywhere. Trust me, there's nothing much. Just a little bit longer, and taller. About 10 seconds I guess?

Think these are all for today. Goodnight :)

Give me some sunshine

Give me some rain

Give me another chance

I wanna grow up once again ...

xoxo

~Damn blogger, look at all the spacings. Urgh.